to my amelya. on your fifth birthday...

i can't believe you're five. five years!!

how can it be that it was already five years ago i held your nine pound four ounce body in my arms for the first time? i remember thinking before being in labor how i wasn't going to cry like 'they' do on tv. ha! i lied to myself. i cried when i saw you. when i held you. when i looked into those precious eyes of yours and at your rolls on your thighs.

i cried for days after you were born. just not believing what we'd been blessed with. after a few short days i knew there was no way i could go back to work. even though you'd be with me in my room at work. there was no way i could give up any attention to other people's babies.

so for weeks i cried. and then daddy asked me why i was crying. i said i didn't want to go back to work. you know what he said?! then don't. so i didn't.

i'll always remember cuddling and snuggling with you in the rocking chair as we lazily slept away some days. and watching daddy be a daddy to you, was the coolest thing in the world to me. so cool in fact i let him rock you to sleep every night. ((again something i never said i'd do!))

you were always my go getter. crawling at six months. but waiting til after a year to walk.

at a mere eight months old you were told you were going to be a big sister!! you handled it so well. :0) but i saw the love you had for bunny and baby dolls and knew you'd be great.

and great you were. even at 15 months old i loved watching you form a bond with your little sister breigh. you held her. for short times. and i remember you kissing her all the time.

so when she was eight months old, and you were both going to be big sisters...we knew you guys would be great!! and caitlyn couldn't have any better big sisters.

and of course when she was only SIX months old...and all three were going to be big sisters...we weren't worried at all (about that!) and dustin is so blessed to have such great big sisters.

and now as we're adding another sister to the mix i can't wait.

you're the oldest. the bossiest. just like me. and i love watching you.

you have such a sweet heart. you're so compassionate towards everyone. and you're heart is so open and willing to accept anyone. you're shy like your daddy, but it's okay. i know you talk all the time at home.

i love the pictures you draw just for me. i love how each and every detail is planned out perfectly. and i will never forget my first 'i love you mom' note. it's something i'll keep forever. ((and pull out the first time i hear i hate you. which is hopefully never))

i love you baby girl. you'll always be my baby girl. i love when you still want to cuddle with me. and still want to hold my hand as we go to bed. and how you want me to cover you up...with each layer specifically stated.

i love that i've been called to homeschool you. and i love your passion for learning. and your sponge like capability to remember it all. it amazes me.

what amazes me even more is at the tender age of four you accepted jesus into your heart 'one day in the van'. that you know you need him in your life. and that as you get older you see it more and more. and love to do our family devotionals together. and pray together. and pray for your friends. it blesses me so much to see your heart love jesus.

if i have one bit of advice on your fifth birthday...don't lose your thirst for jesus. or for life. or for your passions. keep your eyes on christ miss amelya francis and it'll all be good. it's the one thing i can promise you and know that i can't break it.

i love you. my amelya bedlia. my mini-me. my baby girl.

five years ago you made me a mommy. and i'm so proud to be yours.

happy birthday princess!!

love mommy.